Creating a writing ritual

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When my youngest was in elementary school, she gave me a little rock as a gift. On it she drew a heart on one side in red marker, and on the other side she wrote the words ”Create BIG things.” Elizabeth Gilbert would be proud.

At the time I was writing the manuscript of THE WARNING, what would eventually become my debut novel, in a cramped two-bedroom basement apartment.

The rock now sits in my writing office in a dish of beach stones and sea glass collected over the years, in a creative space that I still can’t believe is mine.

I love how she capitalized the word BIG. How often do we need to give ourselves permission to dream at all, never mind to dream BIG? Especially as women. Especially while working paycheck to paycheck.

Holding such a small stone made by my child years ago feels powerful. There’s so much understanding and acceptance and love and childhood joy harnessed in that moment of time.

It reminds me that it’s never a waste of time to create. It reminds me that simple things can be profound.

But let’s be honest— the creative life is a joy until it’s not.

Until it becomes a second job, and the words no longer flow. Sometimes the real world and stress infiltrates our creative mental space. When that happens, I like to practice a new writing ritual to get back on track.

Photo by Prateek Katyal on Unsplash

There are two ways to motivate yourself: a push or a pull.

A push is like setting an alarm or having an accountability partner or deadline.

A pull is an enticement, something to draw you in.

Over the past few years, I’ve tried various things to inspire and motivate me to write. During winter, some of those tricks don’t work as well, like showering mid-afternoon or going on a long walk (too cold in Massachusetts).

I need my writing ritual to be a magical pull into the creative flow. I need to escape the stress of teaching and the world and enter a sacred space. I need it to be simple and special.

So here’s what has been working for me to get back into the flow state.

Photo by Rebecca Peterson-Hall on Unsplash

My current writing ritual:

1. Light a candle.

2. Lay the rock near the candle as a reminder. You could use any special object that inspires you.

3. Stretch and breathe intentionally for 2-5 minutes. Basically, do my favorite yoga poses to get circulation going, loosen up my shoulders and hips, whatever feels good in the moment, to ground myself into the present. I sigh audibly a few times, letting out stress and inner frustrations.

4. Enjoy a guided meditation designed for creativity for 10-15 minutes. There are plenty online (check YouTube). I like guided meditations because they aren’t silent. The voiceover helps me to focus on my physical form, and then activates my imagination.

5. Ask the universe for guidance.

6. Write for an hour. Use a timer. Music is optional.

7. Stretch and breathe intentionally for 2 minutes. Thank the universe for the guidance.

8. Blow out the candle.

The first time I went through this ritual, I felt slightly uncomfortable and began judging myself. Why was I trying to make my writing time so high maintenance? Why was I wasting more time?

But it wasn’t true. I deserve to come to the page with my heart open. What was keeping me stuck was this inner, judgmental voice not letting me do whatever the fuck I want in my creative space. So I lit my candle, did my routine, and voila! The words have been pouring out of me. It’s nice when the universe takes the wheel.

How do you prime yourself to create big things? How do you get unstuck?